


Softball and Photographs

by luthorthemyscira



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Non-Binary Character, Coming Out, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Inspired by a Movie, Light Angst, My First Fanfic, trigger warning for sexual harrasment
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-02
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-01-08 04:05:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 16,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12246639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luthorthemyscira/pseuds/luthorthemyscira
Summary: Clarke and Lexa used to be friends in high school, but when a photo of them kissing starts circling around in school things get awkward between them. What happens when they meet two years later in collage??





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

Lexa looked at herself in the mirror, black ripped jeans, a white pocket t-shirt, a red and black checked flannel and a brown hat over her unbrushed messy dark brown hair was probably enough to impress people on her first day at collage. To say that Lexa was nervous wasn't a statement it was a fact, Lexa was nervous...super nervous in fact and she hoped that this year would be better than her last two years in high school...  
\- Are you ready to go? Asked Lincoln her best friend  
Lexa nodded, grabbed her Nikon D3200 and then they both went out the door.  
The last two years had tested their friendship with Lexa coming out. But now they were both back to being friends and the bad memories where now all behind them.  
...  
After a while Lexa and Lincoln arrived at the school, they both hoped out of Lincoln's white Renault Clio 1. He had bought the car using money he had inherited from his grandma who had died in cancer a year ago. After that Lincoln had moved in together with Lexa and her mother Indra and now they were both going to the same collage together.  
\- See you at lunch? Asked Lincoln and went away to his class.  
Lexa nodded and headed to her class. They had both been smart enough to go to the collage a few days before the semester started and get their schedule and a map of the school. According to her schedule Lexa's first class was Photography in classroom D201 so it was to there she was heading.  
When Lexa went in the corridor towards the classroom a big group of female softball players went past her. Lexa ignored them stepped to the side to not disturbed them, took a sharp left turn and bumped into someone.  
...

Clarke swung the softball bat once again, this time the ball landed a few meters into the field, Clarke took off and ran, she rounded all of the bases before she laid down on the grass.  
Their trainer Mr Kane blew his whistle and Clarke knew it was a sign that softball practice was over. Clarke followed her teammates towards the showers, since the school had mold problems in the showers they usually showered in they had to use the showers that Arkadia swim team used. When Clarke was lost in her thoughts her other teammates had walked away from her. Clarke ran to catch up to them but bumped in to someone making them both fall on the ground...

Lexa looked at the girl she had ran into, her brain knew exactly who it was when she saw the face, Lexa hurried up grabbed her backpack and ran towards the classroom.  
"Shit, Shit, Shit, Shit" she thought, this couldn't be true...she couldn't had run into Clarke fucking Griffin. The thing was that Lexa didn't hate Clarke in fact a few years ago Lexa had been in love with Clarke. They had considered each other friends and they also had something going on. But that had all went to hell when both girls had sat in a office together with Lincoln and everyone’s parents talked about a photograph in the senior year book, a photograph off Lexa and Clarke sharing a kiss at a nightclub they went to together. Instead of telling the truth Clarke claimed that she didn't want Lexa to kiss her, Clarke parents had also pressed police charged against Lexa making her being forced to move from Ton DC to another town called Polis.  
...  
Clarke watched Lexa ran away, it made her sad but deep down inside she knew why and deep down inside she knew that it was her fault. Clarke wished she could go back in time and make things right again. But she couldn't and the mistake she had made just because she had been scared was coming back to haunt her, she had lied to the principal at the school, lied to her parents when she told them that Lexa had jumped her and kissed her without her will. But mostly she had lied to herself, lied to herself when she told herself that she didn't like Lexa like that, but the truth was she did, she had just been scared, confused...not being able to identify as bisexual back then.  
Clarke sighed... hopefully she would get the chance to talk to Lexa but right now she had no idea where Lexa was also she really had to take a shower.  
...  
\- So how were the first classes asked Lincoln?  
\- Good, answered Lexa  
\- Good? Is that all you are going to say? I mean can't you say anything more than Good?  
\- She's here.  
Lincoln looked at Lexa confused  
\- Who's here? He asked Lexa  
\- Clarke?  
Lincoln once again looked confused before Lexa gave him a look that basically said you know who I'm talking about  
\- Clarke as in Clarke fucking Griffin? Asked Lincoln  
Lexa nodded


	2. Chapter 2

History class had gone by painfully slow, for Clarke anyway. All Clarke could think about was Lexa...she really needed to talk to her...she really needed to explain herself. Clarke knew that there was a really low chance that Lexa would forgive her but still deep down inside Clarke felt that it could be better if they just got the chance to talk.  
History class went by slowly and after that it was time for lunch. She followed her friends and team mates Octavia and Raven to their usual table in the cafeteria. The girls started to talk about their usual stuff, how summer was, their upcoming softball matches...etc  
\- Omg, he's cute Octavia said suddenly.  
\- Who? Asked Raven wondering who Octavia talked about.  
Octavia showed Raven who she meant by pointing. Raven nodded and agreed with Octavia.  
\- You're right Octavia he really is cute  
This time Clarke took more interest in who Octavia and Raven where talking about and looked at who they were pointing at.  
Lincoln Whittle  
Octavia really had to think that Lincoln Whittle, Lexa Woods best friend was cute.  
\- Who's that girl sitting at the same table as him? Asked Raven confused  
\- I really hope it isn't his girlfriend. Said Octavia  
\- It isn't...Clarke said quietly  
\- How do you know? Asked Raven confused  
Shit, Shit, Shit Clarke thought she had said it so low that no one could hear what she said, but somehow Raven and her goddamn ears had managed to pick up on the words that came out of Clarke's mouth.  
\- I mean...they don't look boyfriend, girlfriend close you know if I had a boyfriend I would be way touchier, they just look like friends according to me.  
Clarke said lying hoping that Raven and Octavia would believe her....  
Lunch went by and the girls went their separate ways. Since Clarke had one and a half hour off free time before her Math class started, Clarke decided to spend the time at the library.  
Clarke headed towards the library went inside and went to see if her favourite chair was occupied. It was, by none other than Lexa Woods. A part of Clarke told her that she needed to talk to Lexa about what happened, but another part of her brain told her to turn around and ran away as fast as she could. But even though a part of her brain screamed at her Clarke managed to walk to Lexa.  
\- We need to talk.  
Lexa looked up to her with an irritated glance.  
\- Do we??  
\- Please...Clarke said begging  
Lexa thought for a while...I mean it couldn't become worse then it already was, so what was the big harm?  
\- Okay you got 5 minutes  
\- I know... I know what I did was stupid and I know that you'll never forgive me but I did it because I was scared. And I guess I really hadn't accepted back then who I was. I hope one day you can forgive me and let us be friends or at least don't hate me anymore.  
With those words Clarke went away from Lexa and found another spot in the library, she opened her book with Edgar Allen Poe collected works and started reading.  
...  
One and a half hour went by before Lexa headed to Math class. In the corner of her eye she could see Clarke walking behind her following her...great she had to spend a whole lesson together in the same room as Clarke.  
The class went by painfully slow... Lexa had never liked Math anyways.  
The bell rang and showed that school was over the day.  
Lexa grabbed her backpack, camera and was just about to leave when their teacher Mrs Brown told her that she wanted Clarke and Lexa stay for a while. Seriously it felt like Clarke was haunting her


	3. Chapter 3

Both girls waited patiently wondering what Mrs Brown wanted. Seconds that felt like minutes passed before Mrs Brown opened her mouth.   
\- Miss Woods, I looked back at your high school grades and saw that you really had a low grade in math, since this is collage math and harder math I thought that you were in need of a tutor, so that is why miss Griffin is here. Miss Griffin I want you to tutor Miss Woods in math until Christmas break at least, are there any problems with that? Mrs Brown asked  
Lexa was just about to open her mouth to protest but Clarke managed to talk to before her.  
\- No problems answered Clarke.   
....  
Both girls stepped out of the classroom together, she couldn't believe it, first day at collage and her teacher already believed that she was in need of a tutor. And Clarke, did it really have to be Clarke, what had she done, to make destiny hate her so much.  
\- So, when do you want to start? Asked Clarke interrupting Lexa's thoughts.  
\- I guess we can start today. Answered Lexa  
\- Okay your apartment or mine? Asked Clarke  
Lexa thought for a while, her and Lincoln's apartment were still filled with packed boxes and dirty plates and glasses filled the whole kitchen sink, basically their apartment was a giant mess.   
\- Your apartment I guess. Answered Clarke  
Both girls headed towards Clarke's car, before driving off to Clarke's apartment.  
...  
Lexa stepped inside Clarke's apartment, she chuckled it looked exactly like she thought it would.   
\- Do you want to look around? Asked Clarke  
Lexa nodded if she was going to be inside Clarke's apartment for a couple of hours she really needed to make the most out of it.  
Lexa looked around in the kitchen and living room before stepping inside Clarke's bedroom. Clarke's bed was bedded with and black and white dotted sheet, and two white and black dotted pillows. Something yellow stuck out underneath one of the pillows. Lexa stepped forward to get a better look at what it was. Then she saw it the jacket she had given Clarke once in high school...

\- You still got it, said Lexa.  
Clarke looked at her confused.  
\- My jacket.  
Clarke looked at her favourite jacket tucked under one of her pillows, there it was the yellow jacket Lexa once had put on her when they both had been inside a thrift store trying on clothes.  
\- Do you want it back? Asked Clarke  
Lexa shook her head no, Clarke could keep it and it looked better on her anyways. But what did it all mean, Lexa thought that the yellow jacket that once was hers were all gone. She had also thought that she would've never meet Clarke again. But life seemed to work out differently.  
...  
Both girls sat down with the homework they had for math lesson until the next Thursday.  
Even though it felt awkward being in the same room as Clarke, Lexa felt good to have her here, because without her she would have never understood all the weird signs and scribbles in her math book.  
Two hours passed before both Clarke and Lexa got done with their homework's.  
\- Do you want me to drive you home? Asked Clarke  
Lexa shook her head no, after all this time with Clarke she needed time to think for herself, and her apartment was only a few neighbourhoods away anyways.  
Lexa grabbed her backpack and camera before leaving the apartment without saying goodbye to Clarke.  
Well outside Lexa fished up her headphones from her pockets put them into her iPhone before putting them into her ears.  
She pressed shuffle on her Spotify playlist and the music started.  
"We do what we have to when we fall in love  
We say what we need to get out when it's not enough  
Whether it's to yourself or looking at someone else  
Everybody lies, lies, lies  
It's the only truth sometimes"


	4. Chapter 4

Lexa stepped inside the apartment, took off her shoes before grabbing a bottle of water from the refrigerator and heading into her room, she headed opened her computer, and her Tumblr. Liking and reblogging stuff on the website and also sending a message to one off her best internet friends called Anya who lived in Ireland.   
After an hour of reblogging stuff, she could hear the apartment door open and close...meaning that Lincoln were home.  
Lexa stepped outside of her room to meet him.  
\- Why didn't you come to the car after school? Lincoln asked  
Shit, Lexa had forgotten to text him and let him now that her teacher had forced her to take tutor lessons with Clarke  
\- Sorry, I had tutor lesson with Clarke, apparently our math teacher Mrs Brown fought it was good for me to have Clarke tutoring me in math.  
Lincoln nodded  
\- And what about you? Why are you home so late? Asked Lexa  
\- Oh...I met a girl in English class we decided to hang out and get ice cream after school. Lincoln answered  
\- Oh...someone got a crush. Said Lexa teasing towards Lincoln.  
\- What about you? Answered Lincoln  
Lexa looked at him confused  
\- Lexa, you basically spent all of your afternoon with someone you once was in love with how was it? Did you guys hook up? Asked Lincoln  
Lexa glared at Lincoln  
\- It was okay, we didn't hook up, all we did was math, there was something that happened though.  
Lexa said the last part quietly  
\- What happened? Asked Lincoln  
Or so she thought...  
\- She still got it.  
\- Huh? Lincoln looked at her confused  
\- My jacket.  
\- The jacket? Said Lincoln with a surprise in his voice  
Lexa only nodded.

...

Clarke watched Lexa leave, without any word. At least they had talked a little bit but things where still awkward between them, and it had become more awkward when Lexa had seen her old jacket.  
Clarke picked the jacket up from her bed and then hung it on a hanger in her wardrobe.  
After that she picked up her guitar, in one hour or so her mom would call and ask her the same old questions, how was school, did she have a boyfriend etc. And Clarke would always give her the same answers, that school was going great and that she didn't have a boyfriend.  
She started strumming on her guitar and singing...  
" Why are there so many songs about rainbows?  
And what is it all about?  
Rainbows are visions but only illusions and rainbows have nothing to hide  
So, we've been told and some choose to believe it  
I know they're wrong wait and see  
Someday we'll find it the rainbow connection  
The lovers the dreamers and me  
Who said that wishes would be heard and answered when wished on a morning star?  
Some thought of that and someone believed it.  
Look what it's done so far  
What's so amazing that keeps us stargazing and what do we think we might see?  
Someday we'll find it the rainbow connection  
The lovers, the dreamers and me"

Clarke's phone rang, she picked it up and answered already knowing that it was her mom on the other side.  
After 20 minutes of talking Clarke felt exhausted.  
Clarke loved her mother and her mother loved her but her mother was also very over protective. If her mother hadn't been so overprotective then maybe Clarke would've had the courage to say that truth two years ago but she didn't. Clarke could only hope that one day she could tell her parents the truth and that they would accept it.


	5. Chapter 5

Once again Lexa was inside Clarke's apartment with her math book in front of her. She groaned did she really need algebra in her life. I mean she wanted to be a professional photographer, then why did she need to learn equations and find out what X was?  
\- What's the problem? Asked Clarke, she could see Lexa having a worried expression on her face.  
\- I hate this, like why do I need to learn Algebra, I want to be a professional photographer...not work as a fucking math teacher or something like that.  
Clarke ignored Lexa's complaining and instead she rose from her chair and got behind Lexa leaning over her left shoulder to look at the math question in the book.  
\- If you have letters on one side and numbers on the other it will get easier said Clarke to Lexa  
\- What? Said Lexa with a confused expression on her face  
Clarke took the pen from Lexa's hand making their fingers brush against each other. Clarke felt fuzzy inside when their fingertips touched but she decided to ignore the feeling for now. Instead she solved the question for Lexa and later explained how she had did it...  
...  
Hours past and the girls continued with their homework, soon both had managed to get answer to every homework question and also compare them to each other's.  
\- See you next Monday? Asked Lexa grabbing from her backpack raising from her chair.  
\- No, Clarke answered  
\- Why? Do you not want to tutor me more or something? Asked Lexa irritated  
\- I've got a softball match. Said Clarke stopping Lexa before they would get into an argument  
\- Oh. Said Lexa  
\- Yeah... so I can't tutor you next Monday...but I'm free on the Wednesday if you need any help. Said Clarke offering a solution towards Lexa.  
\- Nah... it’s okay think I got it, I mean I should be able to do some homework alone right.  
Clarke smiled and nodded  
\- Yeah probably.

...

Clarke looked up at the bleachers, they were playing away from home and most people on the bleachers where rooting for the home team, but Clarke new that they at least had some people rooting for them on the bleachers. She did wish that Lexa was here to root for her too. She still remembers the first time she had seen Lexa, with a camera across her own face taking a picture off Clarke just before she had swung the baseball bat.  
Number 18 had just rounded the bases, making it Clarke's turn...or as the audience would think number 27 's turn.  
Clarke stepped up with her special softball bat in her hand, this was it, hopefully she wouldn't make the same mistake she had made a few years prior.  
....  
Lexa groaned looking down at the question in her math book. She had been wrong she had no idea how to do this by herself. And it wasn't like she could ask Lincoln for help. He would only give her some half-hearted speech, making them both procrastinate and making her completely forget about the homework until last minute. Yeah no...Lexa needed Clarke's help so she decided to send her a quick message  
"I don't understand anything you still free Wednesday?"  
And it wasn't like she had completely wasted her Monday afternoon/evening on trying to do math questions her brain didn't seem to understand. Or I mean she had maybe wasted some hours. But the rest of the hours she could spend to do something else. Her photography assignment for example. Their teacher Mr Olsen had given them an assignment to go around and take photo's around the city where they lived, but even if it seemed like an easy assignment he had told them to put their heart and soul in the photograph's they took.  
Lexa wrote a note to Lincoln telling him where she was going and left it on the kitchen counter. Before putting on her white converse grabbing her camera and keys.  
She walked around for a while not really thinking that anything was worthy photographing. Sure, company's such as Starbucks were amazing but they weren't really that special to photograph. So, Lexa continued with her walk.  
After a little while Lexa came to a smaller part of the city and finally something worth photographing caught her eyes.  
A thrift shop, called Over the rainbow with an old rainbow neon sign next to the letters spelling out the shop's name. Even though the shop where a little bit different, it still reminded her about the thrift shop back in Ton DC or Out of the closet as it had been called.


	6. Chapter 6

Lexa snapped a quick photo off the shop’s sign before heading inside. While inside she looked around. The thrift shop’s owner seemed to be really into the movie The Wizard of Oz. Because the walls in the thrift shop where filled of quotes in cursive font from the movie. One of the quotes on the wall especially caught Lexa’s eye.   
“Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable.”   
Lexa also knew why the quote had caught her eye. It reminded her of the meeting in the office and how she had felt. How she could basically feel Clarke take her heart in her hands and crumble it like it was a brown autumn leave. Lexa decided to snap a quick picture off the sign also.   
….  
The water flowed down Clarke’s body. They had not won the match but they had all played as good as they could, the other team had simply been better. Of course, they all had been disappointed in not winning but they were all lucky enough to have Mr Kane as their trainer. He had basically told them that sometimes you need to lose a thousand times before you can win.   
After dragging a comb in her hair under the water and thinking about how much she needed to cut her hair Clarke stepped out of the shower. She wrapped her lilac towel around her body before stepping out of the bathroom. She quickly dried her hair as good as she could with the towel, it was still damp but she could let the rest of her hair air dry before she put on a green sundress and picked up her phone. She locked it up and noticed that she had two unread messages. The first one was from her dad wondering how the softball match had went and the second message was from Lexa.   
“I don’t understand anything you still free Wednesday?”  
Clarke typed a quick answer  
“Sure, I’ll be there”

...  
The bell rang showing that school was over and that the weekend had finally begun. And Lexa was so thankful this week had been quite stressful with a lot of homework and a big history test coming up. Luckily Lexa had always loved history, she had loved to learn about historical people such as Martin Luther, Rosa Parks, and Elizabeth the first.   
…  
Lexa stepped inside and closed the door to her apartment, she later kicked off her shoes and dragged her ass towards the living room sofa. Turned on Netflix and put on an episode of Jessica Jones. Just as Lexa was to put on a second episode the apartment door opened and closed with a loud bang. Lexa winced at the sound, couldn’t Lincoln learn to close the door quietly? (AN: this feels weird writing since I can’t close door quietly myself). Soon Lexa could feel the couch sink when Lincoln sat down and put his weight on it…  
\- What are you watching? Asked Lincoln  
\- Jessica Jones. Answered Lexa  
\- Jessica who now? Asked Lincoln  
\- Jones. Answered Lexa  
Lincoln made a movement with his right hand that basically told Lexa that he wasn’t interested in the conversation anymore.   
\- Anyways I have some people coming over tomorrow, including Octavia and her friends. I just think it would be fun that you guys learn to know each other.   
Lexa groaned, sure she had no problems with Lincoln inviting some friends over. But she had hoped to spend Saturday alone. Just watching Netflix or taking her camera out to photograph the town some more or possibly visit Over the rainbow again. But life seemed to have other plans for her again.


	7. Chapter 7

TRIGGER WARNING FOR SEXUAL HARRASMENT

Clarke looked at herself in the mirror. A black crop-top, a pair of grey pants, her new cut hair and a grey leather jacket would be a great party outfit, right? Clarke wanted to impress Lexa, if she was going to a party in Lexa’s apartment then she needed to dress as good as she possibly could, and Lexa had always loved her in the yellow leather jacket.  
…  
Lexa groaned, Lincoln had told her that there would only be a few people at the party but when Lexa looked around she could see people everywhere. The kitchen was filled with people drinking, the living room where filled with people making out and someone had turned the living room table into a beer-pong table.  
\- The doorbell rang –  
Lexa groaned again. How many people where Lincoln inviting to their apartment?  
With the corona in his hand Lincoln went to open the door. When he opened the door Lexa could see three girls standing in the door opening.  
Lexa watched him hug and kiss a girl with long black hair put into a side braid, a white top, black leather jacket and a pair of light blue ripped jeans.  
Lexa watched Lincoln drag the three girls towards her  
\- Octavia this is my best friend Lexa. Said Lincoln  
\- And Lexa this is Octavia my girlfriend and Raven and um I guess you already know Clarke  
Seriously? Lincoln was dating one of Clarke’s friends?  
Why hadn’t he told her that? He could have at least given her a warning or something in that style.  
Lexa stepped into her own room and closed the door, she wasn’t that kind of person to party, she preferred to spend her weekends either watching Netflix or reading a good book.  
…  
Clarke could feel his hands roaming her body, she tried to push him away but every time she did he would just come back and start touching her again. Clarke pushed him again this time much harder than she did before causing him to stumble and fall to the ground. Clarke ran away as fast as she could she needed to find a place that was safe, somewhere she could feel safe…  
…  
Lexa was just about to turn on a new episode of Wynonna Earp when someone stumbled into the room. She was about to turn around and yell at the person that stumbled into her own private room, she noticed it was Clarke. And she didn’t look like her normal self, Clarke looked sad, panicked, stressed.  
\- Hey? Hey what happened? Asked Lexa basically running to Clarke’s side.  
\- He…he…  
Clarke couldn’t finish her sentence before she broke down into sobs.  
Lexa wrapped her arms around Clarke and just held her, hoping that she could help the girl she once loved…no actually scratch that, hoping that she could help the girl she did love.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8  
AN: TRIGGER WARNING MENTION OF SEXUAL HARRASMENT After about fifteen minutes of Lexa just holding her Clarke began to calm down. Sure, the big lump in her stomach was still there and her heart was still raising but her tears and hunched breathing had stopped.  
\- Do you want to tell me what happened? Asked Lexa  
Clarke shook her head no  
\- Are you sure? Asked Lexa  
Clarke thought for a while, talking about such things as this was hard, but she also knew that she needed to that she couldn’t bottle up her feelings inside. Besides Lexa had just hugged her and comforted her, even though things between them was difficult.  
\- He…he started touching me…I told him to stop but he didn’t listen. Said Clarke  
Clarke watched Lexa’s expression change…and later leave the room  
…  
The music was still on outside of Lexa’s room, and no one had seemed to notice that Clarke got sexually harassed. They were all too busy with talking, drinking, making out etc. Lexa knew that this party had gone too far. Actually, it had gone too far when people one after one came into the apartment, making it almost impossible to move around in. She needed to stop this party somehow…  
\- The party is over. Lexa said with a strong voice, but no one seemed to hear her.  
The stupid techno music was playing so high, that you couldn’t have a simple conversation  
Irritated Lexa went up to the stereo and pulled out the cord making the music stop suddenly  
Everyone at the party stopped and looked at Lexa…  
\- What are you doing? Asked Lincoln  
Lexa ignored him  
\- I want everyone out, get out of my fucking apartment right now, or I swear to god I call the police. Lexa screamed at the random drunk strangers in front of her.  
…  
It took over one hour for everyone to leave, because Lexa had to go around and wake up people who had drank so much that they were black out drunk…  
\- Lexa? Why did you stop the party? Asked Lincoln  
Lexa ignored him once again, she was just about to go to her room and check up on Clarke when Lincoln grabbed her arm and tried to stop her  
\- Lexa, please…talk to me? Said Lincoln begging  
\- Lincoln…you told me that there would only be a few people, a gathering…not a fucking party where people get drunk and sexually harassed  
\- Wait…what did you mean did someone get?  
Lexa nodded.  
Suddenly Lincoln started crying and Lexa had not seen him cry since his grandmother died  
Lexa wrapped her arm around him, this was the second day that she held someone to comfort them…  
\- It’s my fault… if I only  
Lexa interrupted Lincoln. No…Lincoln it isn’t your fault, sure not inviting so many people could have stopped it but there is only one person’s fault, and do you know who that is?  
Lincoln shook his head no  
The only one to blame is the man who touched Clarke without her permission.

AN: all other chapters where chapters that I already posted on wattpad but I wanted to change the site for the story so I decided to post it here instead. So now updates should be on Tuesdays and Thursdays <3


	9. Chapter 9

TRIGGER WARNING: MENTION OF SEXUAL HARRASMENT

Lexa carefully knocked on the door before entering. It felt weird knocking on her own door, but since Clarke was still inside there Lexa wanted to be respectful towards her. When Lexa stepped inside the room she saw Clarke sitting on the edge of her bed scrolling through her own phone. Lexa scratched herself on the back of her head before she started to talk…  
\- So, everyone has left the party now…and if you want I could drive you home since I haven’t had anything to drink? Asked Lexa  
Clarke looked at her for a couple of seconds before answering  
\- Actually? Do you mind if I stay here, I don’t want to be alone right now? Asked Clarke  
Lexa thought for a while sure things between them was not the best, but who was she as a person if she forced Clarke to leave??  
\- Sure, let me just grab a pillow, a sheet and a blanket and I make the sofa for you  
…

 

Lexa looked down at the bedding she’d just done for Clarke, it didn’t look that good according her own eyes. Since she had done her laundry the day before she had to use both her and Lincolns stuff.  
Lexa entered her room again, and Clarke sat at the same place in Lexa’s bed it looked like she hadn’t moved an inch…  
\- If you want to I can take the sofa. Said Lexa offering  
\- No…I got it said Clarke  
shaking her head when she said the words no…  
Clarke grabbed her phone and the yellow jacket before heading to the sofa and the living room.  
Lexa remained in the same room where Clarke had just left…she felt like she needed to do something more, but she didn’t know what. Right in this moment Lexa wished she had a remote that could turn back time, so she could had stopped the situation from happening…  
…

She felt his hand touch her skin, stroking everywhere from here cheek, to her chest, the lower area on her stomach. She could feel his hand starting to travel down, she said stop, she knew that he heard but he didn’t stop. STOP, STOP she tried again...  
Lexa couldn’t sleep the thoughts circling around in her head where holding her awake, maybe she couldn’t have stopped it somehow, what if…Lexa’s thoughts of self-doubt got interrupted by crying, mumbling and later a voice screaming STOP, STOP.  
Lexa hurried out of bed and out of her room…  
Clarke was laying in the sofa tossing and turning, tears where streaming down her face  
Lexa tried to shake her, to wake her up…but it didn’t seem to work…  
Lexa tried again, this time screaming Clarke while shaking her.  
Clarke woke up suddenly. She looked around, scared she couldn’t really remember where she was. That was until she saw Lexa…Lexa? That meant that she was safe…Clarke fell asleep again.  
Lexa watched Clarke fell asleep again, but she felt like she couldn’t leave so she carefully went to her own room, grabbed her pillow and blanket before making herself as comfortable as possible on one of the living chairs in the living room. 

AN: sorry for the kind of short chapter...I've felt a little off today...also I hadn't planned what I was going to write since I've been busy with school etc...


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10  
The girls sat at the breakfast table and ate breakfast silently. Lexa cut through her fried egg trying to come up with something to say, trying to come up with a conversation starter. Things where more silent and more awkward then it used to be. Lexa didn’t know, she didn’t know what she should talk about, what they could have a conversation about. Lexa thought for a while there had to be something to talk about…right her math test was coming up…she could always start a conversation about that. But what if Clarke was one of those persons who liked to eat when it was quiet and peaceful. 2 years ago, they had eaten breakfast together and talked, but people could change, right? Lexa ignored her negative thought…  
\- So, my math test is coming up do you think I am ready? Asked Lexa  
\- I hope so. Answered Clarke  
\- I mean I had an amazing teacher so…  
This made Clarke smile…and soon both girls where having a giggling fit…  
…  
Lexa and Clarke were walking through the park looking at the things surrounding them. People were playing fetch with their dogs, children were running around in the park playing tag. A few feet away a beautiful cherry tree with light pink flowers where standing surrounded by birches. It looked amazing and Lexa felt like it needed to be captured, she needed a photo of that cherry tree. But it would be boring just getting a photo off the tree. Lexa needed to put a little twist on the photo, she needed to make the capture her own.   
\- Clarke? Asked Lexa  
\- Mm. Answered Clarke  
\- You see that cherry tree?   
Lexa pointed towards the tree  
\- Yeah what about it? Asked Clarke  
\- Well…you see I really want to take a photo of it, but I don’t want to just capture the tree, I want to make the photo a little bit special, so I was wondering if you could go to the see and stand under some of the branches?  
\- Sure  
Both Clarke and Lexa walked towards the tree. Clarke got under a few of the trees branches, tilted her head up, closed her eyes and smiled towards the sun. t According to Lexa it looked like Clarke was sun tanning under the tree. Lexa took a few pictures with her camera, the photos came out beautifully, and it was something she needed to add to her photography assignment…  
After walking around in the park, taking different kinds of photos, both serious photos that Lexa could use in her photography assignment, and photos they took just for fun, the girls separated, and each said a quick goodbye to each other.   
Lexa had an amazing day, so maybe just maybe the girls work their issues out, and hang together more like they used to do?

 

AN: the photo Lexa took is inspired by a photo taken by Oleh Slobodeniuk, if you google his name and sakura tree it is one of the first photos that come up…   
I also wanted to apologize for not tagging this story correctly, since it's my first time using archive of our own, I am still learning...but I am thankful for all the people that comment on this, and I am glad I got to write this story and learn. Also I post chapter 10 on October 10th how cool is that??


	11. Chapter 11

Lexa looked at the different numbers in front of her, the numbers made sense to her but the rest of the squiggles on her math test not so much…  
*think, think, think* what had Clarke teached her, she knew she had it somewhere in the back of her mind, but the only thing her brain could think about just now was how nice Clarke smelled when she was standing over Lexa’s shoulder trying to…  
No, Lexa didn’t have time to think about Clarke right now, she needed to concentrate on the math questions on a sheet of paper in front of her. Lexa had never liked math, she remembered in 5th grade sitting with a multiplication test, she couldn’t understand anything, or she did. Her brain didn’t seem to remember how to solve multiplications. It was like someone had put all her knowledge about how to solve multiplications in a word document and then hit delete. It all had ended with Lexa beginning to cry and running out of the class room a great way to impress the other kids in her class or not….  
…  
\- And that is why Kanye West should be our president…

Clarke groaned, they were doing presentations in English class, where the teacher had told them that they could write and talked about anything. And someone in her class had choose to talk about why Kanye West should be president. 

\- Clarke Griffin

The teacher called her name. 

Clarke had chosen to talk about how the dress code could infect both female, male, transgender, non-binary students etc negatively. 

Clarke walked up to the front of her class with the papers in her hand, and her computer under her arms, she took a deep breath before starting to talk, hopefully the teacher would be happy with what she had to say so she would pass the test. 

…

Lexa walked towards the lunch room it had felt okay leaving the math test at the teacher’s desk. Lexa was just about to go and sit down at the table where she usually sat when she noticed that it was occupied by some exchange students. 

Great, where was she going to sit now? She thought

Lexa looked around to see if there were any empty tables where she could sit down and enjoy her lunch

\- Woods

Lexa looked around trying to find where the voice came from when Lexa noticed Raven, she thought the girls name was, waving at her from Clarke’s table. 

Lexa walked towards the girls the table and decided to sit down in between Clarke and Raven. 

\- So, you are the famous Lexa. Raven said

Lexa looked at her confused

\- Famous?

\- Yeah, I mean Clarke never shuts up about you, Lexa this…Lexa that, every time Clarke opens her mouth something about you comes up. 

\- Oh okay…only positive things I hope

\- Totally

…

Clarke made a note to herself never talk about someone you like when you are near Raven.

AN: So as you might know this fanfic is based on a movie but you might not know which movie. Well it is based on the movie First Girl I Loved...I watched it and felt that it needed a better ending...and I made it a clexa story because well I like clexa


	12. Chapter 12

Lexa had gotten closer to Clarke and closer to her friends. Right now, they were all sitting inside Clarke’s apartment in her living room on the floor playing Monopoly. It was Lexa’s turn again so she took the dice in her hand, shaked and blowed before rolling the dice... 5 steps which also in Lexa’s case meant that she had to go to prison again.

\- You are not very lucky playing Woods. Raven said laughing  
\- Agree, she is almost as worse as Finn. Said Octavia laughing  
\- Who’s Finn? Asked Lexa curious  
\- Oh, just this boy Clarke had a fling with two summers ago, he was her summer boyfriend

Lexa could feel her feelings sink, two summers ago. The same summer she had moved away from Clarke, away after letting Clarke have her heart. Lexa felt like she wanted to cry and scream…tell Clarke to go fuck herself and ask her…ask her how she could’ve hurt her that way. But Lexa knew she couldn’t, Lexa knew she couldn’t tell Clarke to go fuck herself because Clarke’s friends where here and Lexa knew, that Clarke friends didn’t know that she and Clarke had a history together. So instead Lexa faked her smile and faked her laugh. 

Clarke loved her friends, but sometimes they really needed to read her face when her expression basically told them to keep their mouths sipped. But now it was to late, now Lexa knew about Finn…and now Clarke felt like shit. She knew she liked girls, she knew she loved Lexa from all the time they spent together, from speaking the first time at the softball game, to spending time in the old thrift store…to the kiss in the night club, captured by two older men they both had started talking with. Clarke wanted to tell Lexa that she was sorry, to scream that she only dated Finn to get her parents off her back. But instead she sat quietly, ashamed waiting for it to be her turn to roll the dice. 

…

The game ended with Raven winning. Or no…not exactly, they never actually finished the game, but Raven was the one who had most money in the end, so you could say that she had won. 

\- What are we going to do now? Asked Octavia  
\- I was thinking we could eat something, I am quite hungry. Answered Raven  
\- Oh…what do you guys want to eat? Asked Lincoln  
\- I don’t know I’m kinda feeling take out? Answered Clarke

The gang nodded and agreed…take out sounded amazing but now they just had one problem, what kind of take out where they going to get?

...

After a long discussion the gang decided on Sushi. The restaurant they wanted to eat at didn’t have home delivery which meant that someone had to drive and pick it up,  
An hour passed before Lincoln got a notification in his phone telling him that the food was ready. Raven and Octavia left with him, to go and pick it up which meant that Lexa and Clarke where alone together in the apartment…

\- I wanted to say sorry.  
\- Huh?

Lexa looked at Clarke confused

\- I wanted to say sorry because I treated you like shit, I made your life miserable, I destroyed it when I pressed police charges against you. 

Lexa thought for a while, sure she had been angry with Clarke and she had been cold to her during their first conversations. But she had also learned to know Clarke and know that Clarke was a different person then she was two years ago. Lexa had forgiven Clarke, in her own mind… but she had never told her. 

\- Clarke? Lexa said low

Clarke didn’t seem to hear, her head where still hanging low and tears flowing from her eyes. 

\- Clarke? Lexa said it a little higher

Clarke wiped her tears with the back off her hand and breathed slowly to try and stop her sobbing. 

\- Clarke, I can tell you one thing. That thing is that I didn’t like you from the beginning, and I had my reasons you hurt me really bad that day. But I have also spent time with you and I have learned that you are a different person, you are not the same as you where back then. Sure, you still look the same, and you still have the same interests, but you have so much knowledge, and you have learned things about yourself. I forgive you Clarke. 

Lexa held Clarke in her arms.

\- Forgive Clarke for what?

 

Both girls hadn’t noticed Octavia and Raven stand in the door opening listening to the ending of the conversation. 

AN: Sorry for the late update I have been quite busy with lots of tests and exams... and writers block


	13. Chapter 13

Lexa and Clarke started at each other having a silent conversation with their eyes. They both knew that they had to tell Raven and Octavia the truth before things could get even more complicated between them…

\- I want you guys to sit down. Said Clarke making a motion towards the grey sofa that stood in their living room. 

Both Raven and Octavia sat down in sofa and no one made a snarky comment towards Clarke, they could all hear the serious tone in her voice.  
Clarke sighed and tried to calm her nerves before she opened her mouth to talk  
\- Before I talk about the stories, I just want to say that you guys have all right to judge me and get mad at me, but I hope we all still stay friends

Both Octavia and Raven nodded…

\- Clarke…no matter what stupid shit you’ve gotten into…you are our best friend and we will always love you. Said Octavia

Clarke nodded, she knew her friends told the truth and that they wouldn’t leave her, but tears still developed in her eyes

Lexa stepped towards Clarke and wrapped her arms around her to make Clarke feel better.

\- Do you want me to start the story? Asked Lexa

Clarke nodded… it would be much easier for her if Lexa could start the story

\- Clarke and I used to know each other before I came here to Arkadia…we both went to the same high school together and we became friends…and maybe something more than friends?

\- Wait…so you mean that you and Clarke used to date? Said Raven confused

\- No…I mean we could’ve had but it never happened

\- Why not? Asked Octavia confused

\- Yeah, I mean you guys would’ve made a cute couple

\- Guys…if I am supposed to tell you this story I need you guys to be quite okay?

Raven and Octavia nodded and made a sip lips motion with their hands

\- Okay so me and Clarke used to go to the same school and we both met when I was going to do a photography assignment that she also had to do with…because of that assignment we became good friends and something more than that…we never were girlfriends, but we did kiss at a nightclub and later had a make out session in Clarke’s bedroom. We met three guys in that nightclub that all went to the same high school as us, one of them took a picture of us kissing and it ended up in the yearbook, which made my mum and Clarke parents and Lincoln’s grandma end up in the principal’s office together. 

\- Wait? Why was Lincoln in the office? Said Octavia

\- Because I was the one who put the photo in the photo album. I used to have a crush on Lexa and we both fought a lot when Lexa came out to me. 

Said Lincoln who just had walked in the room with two sushi boxes in his hands.

\- Anyway, I told Clarke about my feelings for her, but because she was scared she told her parents that the kiss didn’t mean anything for her and that I had jumped her which caused her mum to fill in police charges against me… but today Clarke told me how sorry she was and I have learned to get to know her better…I knew she isn’t the same person that she was 2 years ago…that was why I told her that I forgave her, because Clarke was saying sorry for all the things that happened between us. 

AN: So I decided that weekends will be my update time...either Saturdays or Sundays


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

I’m young and I’m foolish  
I’ve made bad decisions  
I block out the news  
Turn my back on religion  
Don’t have no degree  
I’m somewhat naive  
I made it this far on my own  
But lately that shit  
Ain’t be getting my higher  
I lift up my head   
And the world is on fire  
There’s dread in my heart   
And fear in my bones  
And I just don’t know  
What to say  
Maybe I’ll pray…

The gang was just sitting around Clarke’s apartment talking, listening to Sam Smith’s song Pray. For Clarke it felt good, it felt good that she didn’t have a secret that weighed her heart down anymore, she could tell her friends about her past mistakes… and the adventures that she and Lexa had together in High School.   
Right now, Lexa was telling her friends the story about the yellow leather jacket…

\- Wait so the reason we’ve never got to borrow your yellow leather jacket was because it was Lexa’s? Asked Octavia

Clarke nodded

Lexa looked at the other girls confused…she wanted to know more about this story. Before the girls could change subject Lexa asked Octavia and Raven to tell her the story…

\- Well I can think of five times that we asked Clarke if we could borrow her leather jacket…so which one do you want to hear about? Asked Raven  
\- Well why not all five of them. Answered Lexa

They could hear Clarke groan in protest in the background

\- Well Octavia why don’t you tell them about the first time? Asked Raven  
\- It was a few months after we all had became friends and Raven was seeing an older guy named Wick  
\- Wait…Wick as in? Candle? Lexa asked confused

Raven nodded

\- Anyway, he invited us to a party and I had just bought a really nice white and black checked t-shirt dress…and I thought I needed some colour to give the outfit some pop…so I asked Clarke if I could borrow her yellow leather jacket, but she said no…and when I asked why she became all defensive over it. 

\- I did not. Clarke said protesting

Both Raven and Octavia looked at Clarke with an expression that practically said, “girl stop lying”

\- And the second time I asked Clarke if I could borrow her yellow leather jacket was the morning I had a job interview, I wanted to look nice during the job interview and my own leather jacket had a giant coffee stain on it…but nope not that time either. Answered Octavia. 

All four girls continued to sit around and chat…and Lexa had a really great time listening to crazy stories about Clarke. It had been awkward and tense in the beginning, but Lexa could feel herself growing closer and closer to Clarke every day. 

AN: There will be a time skip in the next chapter…also sorry for not updating on the weekend…I have no excuse for that…anyways enjoy this chapter lovelies... in this story I am going to use lyrics and songs done by other artist I feel like there is a lot of songs I can connect to Clarke and Lexa…and I also know realized that I post Chapter 14 on the 14th


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

AN: trigger warning for homophobia and biphobia

 

A few months later

Clarke stood nervously in front of the mahogany coloured door, she could feel the pressure in her chest, her heart race and her hands start to sweat. Clarke glanced over to Lexa who stood next to her and looking enchanting with her hair just resting on her back and shoulders, a black choker, a black button down only half buttoned and a pair of round sunglasses resting on her head like one of those diadem Clarke used to wear in her hair when she was around 7 years old.  
Lexa didn’t look nervous at all and in Clarke’s mind Lexa was the one that was supposed to be nervous. Not her…not Clarke, who had grown up in this house, who had spent her childhood running around in the house playing hide and seek and tag with her mom and dad. Clarke took a deep breath before knocking on the door…after seconds that felt like hours, the door opened and there stood her mother dressed in a white blouse and black bootleg pants, with a beige coffee cup in her right hand probably filled with a Rosabaya or another kind of coffee you could get from a Nespresso coffee machine. 

\- Clarke

Clarke’s mother wrapped her hands around Clarke’s waist, it was a relaxing hug at first, but Clarke could feel her mother’s body became stiff when her mother’s gaze met Lexa’s. 

\- What is she doing here? Asked Clarke’s mother with an infuriated voice

\- I want to drop Lexa’s charge. Answered Clarke

\- You want to what? Clarke’s mother looked at her confused

\- You heard me mother, I said I want to drop Lexa’s charge. Answered Clarke

\- But why, she forced herself on you. Honey if Lexa is doing something to hurt...

\- No, mother Lexa has never done something to hurt me in fact I was probably the one who hurt Lexa most because I was the one who lied, who lied about that I wasn’t attracted to girls, who lied about that I didn’t feel anything when we kissed, who lied about that I didn’t love Lexa because I did…in fact I still do. I love her, I love her more then stupid Finn or stupid Bellamy, who you’ve guys tried to hook me up with ever since Octavia and he came to spend some time here last spring. 

If here mother had looked angry before, she looked angrier now. 

\- Get out. Clarke’s mother said with a poisonous voice. 

\- Why? Clarke asked

\- I don’t want people like that in my house. Clarke’s mother answered. 

Lexa could see Clarke’s expression change, she could see her become anxious, almost as anxious as the time when Lexa had found Clarke at the party. Lexa who had stood quiet, just listening and observing knew she had to step in. 

\- You know Mrs Griffin? I might not like you and you might not like me, but I was willing to try and apologize, but you know what I am not going to do that anymore. In fact, you can take your stuck-up attitude and show it up your ass.

With those words Lexa took Clarke’s hands and they both stepped into Lincoln’s white Renault Clio 1…driving off. 

They didn’t stop until they came to a red light, then the girls who had sat seriously next to each other busted out in laughs and giggles. 

\- I can’t believe you just did that. Said Clarke

\- Well I did. I have a question thought? Is it true? Asked Lexa

\- Is what true? Asked Clarke

\- That you still love me? Asked Lexa

 

Clarke nodded…she really didn’t know what to say if Lexa didn’t feel like that anymore she would understand…sure it would hurt…but then again it been years, and could you love a person that hurt you?

Lexa watched Clarke’s expression change. Clarke smiled had been replaced with a more serious facial expression. 

Lexa pushed a piece of blonde hair out of Clarke’s face, before lifting her chin and placing her lips on Clarke’s. It didn’t take long before Clarke answered, and they were kissing, enjoying eachothers taste. This time Clarke’s mouth didn’t taste like alcohol, this time it tasted sweet, like strawberries dipped in chocolate. 

\- I still love you to. 

Lexa whispered when they both broke the kiss to breathe


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16  
Clarke stood nervously outside the police station. This was the first time that she was going to go into the…no scratch that it wasn’t the first time she going to go into a police station doing something important. Or I mean getting passports and going to look and find to see if someone had been a gentle soul and returned her old pink digital camera. Yesterday Clarke had spent her sleepless night googling and researching on how to drop charges against someone. But the research had been hard and difficult to understand so she’d decided to go the police in the early hours so that she didn’t wake up Lexa. Clarke knew that Lexa wanted to help her, but she needed to do this on her own.   
….  
Lexa woke up she moved to snuggle closer to Clarke but instead of feeling Clarke’s warm skin she was met with a cold emptiness. Clarke was gone but a letter had taken her replacement. Lexa lit the bedside lamp to be able to read what Clarke had written  
Dear Lexa  
Before you read this promise me that you won’t be angry.   
I knew that you wanted to help  
I knew that you wanted us to do this together.   
But I have to do it alone.   
The police charge isn’t your fault, it is mine  
Or technically my parents…  
I never signed the police charge… my parents did…  
But according to the police charge I am the “victim”…  
So, I should have a saying in it right?  
Lexa felt a little disappointed that Clarke wouldn’t let her be a part in the whole police business, but she still understood why. It was Clarke or rather Clarke’s family who had written the police charge…not her. Sure, she had been in a huge part, but she had never written it. It was kind of like Clarke’s parents had been the authors and Clarke and her had been the characters, important but not having any regulation of what was going to go on in the story.   
…  
Clarke opened the door to the police station, while inside she was met with a reception. In that reception sat a middle-aged with dark skin and just some short hairpieces on his head. You could almost say that it was like a beard stub. When Clarke walked closer to the reception to grab a queue ticket she saw that the police man had a name tag on the left side of his chest, but she still wasn’t close enough to find out what his name was. Clarke sat down to wait, there where other people in front of her waiting for their turn to be served. Clarke watched the receptionist help people in different ages, with different religions, with different genders etc. And each time the receptionist had helped someone the numbers changed…  
38..37…39…40…41 and finally 42.   
It was finally Clarke’s turn. Clarke walked up to the receptionist and was met with an warm welcome.  
\- Hello, my name is Officer Brook what can I help you with? 

Asked the receptionist 

\- I would like to change a police charge. 

The receptionist nodded and hummed. 

\- I can’t really help you with that now but if you wait for a little while Officer Hart will help you her is one of the best when it comes to police charges. 

Clarke thanked the receptionist before walking to a beige living chair that sat in a little waiting room. She grabbed herself a cup of coffee and just started to wait, and she could feel the nerves coming up again. 

AN: Sorry for the late update I’ve had a busy weekend with family coming over, and also me being exhausted from work, sick and coughing up my lungs etc. There want be an update next weekend due to me celebrating my uncles birthday.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Clarke looked at the clock on her wrist, she knew that she had only waited for a few minutes but in her mind those minutes felt like hours, years even. And with every minute ticking by she could feel herself getting more nervous. What would happen? How would the police react knowing that she had lied? Or maybe not lied…she just didn’t tell her parents that she had liked the kiss, she had been quiet making her parents believe their stereotypical thoughts about what happened that night. That Lexa must have forced herself on Clarke, because in Clarke’s parents minds she wasn’t a lesbian. And you could say that they where right in one way, she isn’t a lesbian, but she is still very much interested in girls. 

“hm hm”

Clarke thoughts got interrupted by an older man clearing his throat next to her. 

\- Excuse me miss, are you Clarke Griffin? 

Asked the man who had cleared his throat next to her. 

“Clarke nodded”

The older man stretched out his hands towards Clarke making it a symbolization that he wanted to shake Clarkes hand. Clarke took his hand and she noticed that he had a steady fish it wasn’t like when she said hello to people and they had grips that felt like dead fishes. She didn’t like those kinds of grips, but she did understand that some people didn’t like to introduce themselves to others. 

\- Pleasure to meet you Miss Griffin. I am Mr Hart

Said the older man towards Clarke interrupting her thoughts again. 

\- Ditto. 

Answered Clarke.

Ditto? Why did she use the word ditto? Did the older man even know what the word ditto meant? Once again Clarke could feel herself getting more nervous. 

The man mentioned for Clarke to follow and she did. They soon walked into a small room, with two white chairs and a white table with an old coffee stain on it. What was this room, was it an interrogation room? Honestly Clarke didn’t want to now.   
…

The doorbell rang when Lexa stepped into the store. It had been years since she had been inside Out of the closet as the store was called. Out of the closet had been one of Lexa’s favourite stores while she lived in Ton Dc. The thrift store had been one of her favourite places to look for clothes in. 

\- Woods? Is that really you?

Lexa turned around. Smiled and hugged the girl that stood in front of her. 

In front of her stood a very good friend of her Anya. Anya also identified as gay and she had been a very good help when Lexa had just been a baby gay and filled with questions. She was also the owner of the store. 

\- What are you doing here Woods? Have you’ve moved back? Asked Anya

Lexa shook her head no

\- When what are you doing here? Asked Anya  
\- It’s a long story if I tell you then it is going to take all day. Answered Lexa.   
\- I got all the time in the world. 

The girls sat down in a couple of black living chairs in the corner of the thrift shop and Lexa started telling Anya about everything going on. From running into Clarke (literally) to Clarke being her math tutor, to the party…the girls talked for around 40 minutes. Before Clarke called and told Lexa that she was on her way to the hotel. 

AN: YOU CAN'T HAVE AN CLEXA STORY WITHOUT ANYA.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Lexa Pov

Clarke and Lexa sat in the front seat of Lincoln’s Renault Clio 1, while the radio where playing the beautiful voices of Ed Sheeran and Beyoncé where singing in perfect harmony. It had been three days since Clarke had spent her day in the police office and three days of Clarke not telling her how it had gone. Every time Lexa would ask Clarke, Clarke would either change the topic of their conversation our kiss Lexa.   
And anyone who really knew Lexa, knew that Clarke’s lips made her weak. Speaking of kissing, Lexa still didn’t know where their relationship stood, sure they had tried watching Anatomy of a love scene on Lexa’s computer yesterday, but it had ended up with them having a make out session during the whole movie and honestly Lexa couldn’t remember what the movie was about. But Lexa didn’t give a fuck about that, if she wanted to know what the movie was about she could easily look it up on google or on imdb. What Lexa did want to know was where their relationship where standing and what had happened. Lexa turned off the radio cutting Camila Cabello’s Havana off. 

\- Hey why did you do that? Asked Clarke in protest  
\- Clarke…I need you to talk to me. What happened in the police office? I need to know

Clarke avoided Lexa’s glance and still didn’t give her an answer. 

\- Clarke please, I promise you what ever happened I won’t get angry. 

Clarke sighed…

\- Nothing happened okay, sure we did talk but since I wasn’t the one singing the police charges, I couldn’t do anything about it. I didn’t tell you because I was scared that you would be disappointed at me Lexa. 

\- Hey it’s okay Clarke. You did what you could. 

Lexa put her hand on Clarke’s knee in a comforting gesture. 

\- And Clarke I promise you we find a solution together.

For the first time in minutes Clarke smiled. 

\- What do you think Clarke, do you think we can turn on the radio again, so we can have a dance party to the finale moments of Havana?

Lexa turned on the radio again, and the girls danced and sang to Camila Cabello’s Havana. 

Sure going back to Ton Dc had not fixed things like Lexa hope that it would, and Lexa still didn’t know where their relationship stood, but that was something that she could find out together, together with Clarke. 

AN: Sorry for the late update, I’ve had an essay, and then Christmas came around last weekend ( I live in Sweden and for some reason we celebrate Christmas the 24th, why idk) and I also got writers block, but update should be fine again during the new year. Also sorry that it is a short chapter.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Clarke read the words on her computer again and again. She had spent several hours of her afternoon trying to come up with how she was going to drop the chargers. But every time she came up with something she always had to read about that filing a false police report could get charged as a misdemeanour or a felony. Clarke read about that a misdemeanour ment she might have to spend at least a year in prison and pay Lexa a fine for the false police report, or it could be charged as a felony. She could end up in more prison more then one year.   
Now Clarke knew that she had not filed the false police chargers, but she had been a huge part of it and therefor would end up in either of the two situations. Two situations that would lead to prison. And Clarke didn’t feel like being a part of some orange is the new black kind of thing. The easiest things for Clarke would be if she could get a lawyer, someone she could talk to and someone that could help her get a chance off a lower judgment, but how was she going to be able to get a lawyer that could assign the case a case that wasn’t really hers. And if, if she finally found someone where was she going to find the money to pay a lawyer. Clarke thought for a while finding some extra work aside from school would help, but could she fit it in between softball practices, matches and homework. She also knew that if their softball team won the women’s collage world series, she also could get almost enough money to pay a lawyer, but it was a long shot, it took training lots of training and she didn’t know if they were ready…

-Knock Knock- 

A knock on Clarke’s apartment door interrupted Clarke’s thoughts and googling. Clarke went to the door to open it she had no idea how it could be since her friends all where busy. Clarke opened the door to see Lexa standing in front of her. Lexa’s hair was up in a ponytail she had a black hat on her head a black tank top a trashed jean jacket and a pair of white shorts. Clarke looked down what she was wearing. Her grey sweatpants and her big red Coca-Cola hoodie inspired by the youtuber Elle Mills felt like shit compared to what Lexa was wearing. 

\- Are you going to let me in our not

Once again Lexa interrupted Clarke’s thoughts. 

\- Yeah sure

Clarke moved so Lexa could take of her shoes and step into her apartment. 

Clarke watched Lexa take her shoes of before she realized that she had forgot something. Lexa had told her that she had an important photograph assignment and that she would be busy all day so what was she doing here?

\- Lexa what are you doing here, I thought you had an important photograph assignment and would be busy all day. Said Clarke  
\- That is true, and I need to go in a while, but I needed a photo of you in my photograph assignment.   
\- Is that true or is the photo for your private assignment? Asked Clarke  
\- Okay…okay you got me I don’t really need a photo of you for the photograph assignment. But one of you on my desk would be perfect. 

Lexa picked up her Nikon D3200 to take a picture of Clarke. 

\- Lexa wait stop, you can’t take a picture of me when I look like this I look like a mess.   
\- No Clarke you look absolutely perfect, nothing could make you look less perfect. You look perfect with or without makeup, a pair of good jeans or sweatpants doesn’t matter. Heck even when you have residue of black paint on your face from softball matches you still look perfect. And speaking of having black paint in your face I always thought that if someone where to have it, it would be me…

Now can you please smile for the camera. 

Clarke did what Lexa told her and soon Lexa’s Nikon D3200 got filled with a photo of a flustered and a smiling Clarke Griffin.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Lexa was about to snap another picture of Clarke when a message came up on the screen of her camera. Great the camera’s memory card where full, and all her other memory cards was in one of her desk drawers back in her own apartment. But the thing is that she needed more memory space in her camera since her assignment was far from done, she still had photos to take and honestly Lexa should have checked the camera’s memory card before she went out to do the assignment, how did she forget such an important thing in photographing? The only way that she would be able to get more memory space on her camera was if she could transfer the pictures, somehow…maybe, just maybe she could borrow Clarke’s computer and then email herself the pictures on her camera. 

\- Hey Clarke? Can I borrow your computer?

Clarke nodded, Lexa borrowing her computer wouldn’t do any harm. And she had closed all the internet tabs and shut down the computer the way you are supposed to do right? Right? Now Clarke started to become nervous…had she shut down the computer right or not or had she just slammed her computer shut. What was she going to do? Stop Lexa from using her computer? No…that would just make things worse. That would make it seem like Clarke was hiding something…  
Okay Clarke was hiding something, but her screaming that Lexa couldn’t use her computer would seem like she was hiding something awful like cheating on Lexa. Or I mean in technical terms it wouldn’t been cheating since Clarke and Lexa wasn’t a couple yet but…

…  
As soon as Lexa opened Clarke’s computer she was confused. Clarke’s computer didn’t open like Lexa was used to instead of a background, a profile picture and a password that you were supposed to type in. Instead when Lexa opened Clarke’s computer, Lexa could see that Clarke’s internet browser was open and all the pages that where still open, all the pages that she had visited in the last hour or so. Lexa could see normal pages such as facebook and twitter being open but also pages such as thelawdictionary.com, attorneys.com. Why would Clarke visit police sites? There could only be one explanation. Clarke was still trying to come up with a way to drop her charges. 

\- Clarke

Clarke looked at Lexa with a worried expression on her face, she knew that Lexa had told her that it didn’t matter to her anymore, but it mattered to Clarke. Clarke was the one who had done something wrong…

\- I know you told me it doesn’t matter Lexa but for me it does…for me it does matter, I was the one who did something wrong…I was the one who did something stupid. 

Clarke hid her face, she didn’t want to look Lexa in her eyes right now, not now not when Lexa was disappointed in her. 

\- Clarke…  
Clarke refused to look up

\- Clarke please

With hesitation Clarke slowly looked up…

\- I am not mad at you Clarke…I just wish that you told me that you still wanted to solve this, and I support you Clarke…no matter what this situation leads to I support you…and do you want to know why?

Clarke nodded. 

\- I would support you no matter what because I love you Clarke…I have loved you for a long time know and something in me has always known that. 

AN: SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE I HAVE NO EXCUSE EXCEPT THAT I AM LAZY...


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21  
Clarke looked at the mess of clothes that laid on her bed. It was date night for her and Lexa and Clarke had called Raven and Octavia in panic begging them to help her with what she was going to wear. Only the helping part had turned into Raven and Octavia tossing all off the clothes in her wardrobe onto her bed. Right know Octavia and Ravens idea of helping had turned into sorting Clarke’s clothes in three different piles. A definitely not toss those clothes away pile, a maybe pile, and a yes pile. To Clarke it felt like most of the clothes she owned either got into the definitely not pile or the maybe pile. Where none of the clothes she owned good for her best friends?   
\- Seriously guys? Are my clothes really that bad?  
\- For a date yes…to walk around in at home during the weekend no. Answered Raven  
\- Come on at least we found five outfits that could work for you try them on. 

Clarke tried on her outfits, the first outfit consisted of a white top with a brown accessory belt around the stomach area, a pair of black jeans and a pair of brown ankle boots. 

\- Love the boots, hate the rest of the outfit next. Said Octavia

The second outfit consisted of a mustard yellow shirt, a brown coat, a pair of worn jean shorts and a pair of black high heels.   
Both Raven and Octavia looked at Clarke up and down before turning around and having a low conversation with each other. Clarke couldn’t here what the girls where saying due to music playing loud inside the apartment. According to Raven music had to be played when you where getting ready for date night. Clarke was just about to ask what they where talking about when Octavia went to Clarke’s bed took pieces of clothes from the different piles and tossed them into Clarke’s direction.   
\- Go to the bathroom and try this on. Said Octavia. 

Clarke went to the bathroom with the pile of clothes in her arms. While inside the bathroom Clarke could see what kind off clothes Raven and Octavia had picked out for her. Her brown skirt, the brown coat, a black body suit that Clarke had only bought so she could try out and see if she liked the new clothing trend. She didn’t like the trend, but she didn’t hate it either. Clarke tried the outfit on, she liked it, it was an outfit made for her and she hoped Lexa would also like it. Sure, she had to almost strip naked while going to the toilet, but hey at least she looked good. Clarke quickly did some light makeup, brushed her hair and pulled the top layers of the hair into a bun before exiting the bathroom. 

\- Dang Clarke if I wasn’t straight I would have love to go on a date with you. Said Raven teasingly.   
\- Are you sure you are straight? Said Clarke teasing back.

…

Lexa stood nervously outside Clarke’s apartment door, she had the car keys to Lincoln’s Renault Clio 1 in her left hand (why she didn’t have them in her pocket she didn’t know) and a bouquet with yellow lilies in the other. Hopefully Clarke would like the flowers, hopefully Clarke had something that she could put the flowers in. Lexa had no idea if Clarke had a vase inside her apartment or not. Maybe flowers where a bad idea, I mean how many collage students think of bringing a vase when they are moving into their first apartment? You should have bought something else instead, like chocolate or something in that style. Not fucking flowers. But Lexa couldn’t turn back now. She couldn’t toss the flowers and buy chocolate instead. Or she could, but that would make her late to the date with her and Clarke and Lexa didn’t want that. She wanted to make a good impression to Clarke…

Lexa knocked at Clarke’s apartment door, inside her mind hoping that Clarke had a vase that she could but the yellow lilies in. 

AN: I was so close not posting on a weekend since I didn't know how to write the chapter I knew what I wanted to write just not how...but hey I did it and I actually posted on a weekend. Also I can't believe I am already 21 chapters in...I think this is one of the longest fanfics I've written.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22.   
Clarke opened the door as soon as she heard knocks on the door. Outside stood Lexa looking nervous dressed in a baggy white pocket t-shirt that was tucked in a pair of grey suit trousers, she had on a pair of black vans, a black wristwatch on her left wrist and she had chosen to wear her oval glasses instead of contact lenses. Not that Clarke complained though because Lexa looked perfect in glasses.   
\- Lexa come in. 

Said Clarke realising she had just stood there without actually letting her date come inside. Instead she had stood there for minutes checking her date out. 

\- I brought you some flowers and then I panicked because I thought it was a bad idea…not buying flowers for you but maybe you don’t have a vase. I should have bought you something else instead like chocolate. Do you even like chocolate?

\- Lexa it’s fine I absolutely love the flowers. 

Clarke took the flowers from Lexa to stop her date’s rambling. She went to the kitchen opened one of the counter tops before bringing a dusty vase outfit (in her defence she didn’t use vase’s that often) before filling the vase with water and putting the flowers in. 

\- So, the flowers are in water are you ready to go? Asked Clarke.

Lexa nodded. 

…  
Lexa pulled Lincoln’s Renault Clio 1 (note to herself she really needed to get her own car) into the parking lot. She had booked reservations at a restaurant just a couple of miles outside of Arkadia, a restaurant that was famous for their amazing lobster casserole. Both girls exited the car before entering the restaurant together.   
\- Hi, we got a reservation for two.

Said Lexa greeting one of the waitresses in the restaurant.   
\- It should be under the name Woods

The worker in the restaurant looked around in the restaurant system for a while before smiling

\- Ah here it is. Table for two?

Lexa nodded to confirm the waitress question. 

\- Follow me 

Said the waitress of the restaurant before nodding her head to her side as she turned around and started to walk the couple to their table. The girls asked for some water, as they weren’t really in the mood for alcohol and opened their menus. 

…

Clarke looked at the menu in front of her, she was hungry but not really in the mood for something. And menus meant so many different decisions and choices. Did she want sea food with her water? Meat? Or something vegetarian. Did she want rice? Pasta? Or Potatoes. 

Clarke looked up from her menu to see if Lexa was ready to order not. It seemed like Lexa already had chosen what to eat. How could the girl choose so fast, when there where so many options? 

\- Take as long time as you need.

Said Lexa who had noticed that Clarke had a tough time deciding what to eat. 

Clarke took Lexa’s advice before looking at the menu once again. After a while Clarke had finally decided what she wanted to eat. 

After closing their menus, a waitress came and took their order, it took around 45 minutes more before the waitress brought their food out. Clarke had decided to eat a caesar salad and Lexa had chosen to eat a club sandwich. 

\- Why did you choose to focus on your softball skills?

Asked Lexa trying to break the awkward air between them. 

\- I mean it is totally your choice, but I thought you wanted to become a teacher? Asked Lexa  
\- I mostly choose softball because of my parents when they heard that I had a chance of winning a scholarship. To be honest with you I really didn’t have a choice. And by the way softball players earn more money then teachers and money are a big deal with my family. Said Clarke seaming annoyed with her parents.   
\- Honestly sometimes your parents kinda sucks. Said Lexa.   
\- They totally do. Said Clarke giggling at Lexa’s broad statement. 

The girls continued their date with talking, laughing and flirting before Lexa drove Clarke to her apartment. The girls left each other with a kiss and a promise that they both had to do this again.

AN: I was bored so I decided to write early so two chapters for you guys this week. Hope ya'll enjoy :). Also thanks for all the amazing comments this far, I love hearing what you guys feel about this fanfic.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

\- This game isn’t just a regular game, it is one of the most important games of the year, so I want you all to get out there and kick some ass. 

Clarke was sitting inside a locker room listening to Mr Kane’s pep talk before the match. This wasn’t just a regular match thought, this was a match that was very important for her. The first match in the women softball college series. If they won this match and if they won the whole series Clarke had a better change of helping Lexa, of doing things right. 

Clarke followed the other teammates of Arkadia Panthers into the area where they would play against Ton- DC softball team also known as Ton- DC Hawks. As soon as Clarke entered the softball field her eyes scanned the grandstand trying to see if she could spot Lexa somewhere. Instead Clarke spotted something that she didn’t think she was going to see for a while, her mother and father was sitting in the audience and was going to watch her softball game. Clarke thought that after the rough meeting in Polis that her parents wouldn’t show up to her softball games anymore, that they wouldn’t support their daughter due to her going against gods ways. 

\- Hey Clarke

Clarke thoughts got interrupted by Raven telling her it was time for the match to start and time for her to get into her position as right fielder. 

….

Lexa tried squeezing between people’s legs and the back of the blue chairs in the grandstand. She was a few minutes late and had just been able to slip in before they were closing the doors to the grandstand. And Lexa slipping in in the nick of time also meant she got some dirty looks from the man that was taking care of tickets and people getting in and out. 

Lexa finally found her seat and she could now sit down and enjoy the softball game…or more like trying to figure out what was going on. Clarke had tried explaining the rules off softball during their date but to be honest Lexa hadn’t really been listening. I mean how could she when Clarke was looking absolutely beautiful. 

Lexa’s thoughts got interrupted when the Clarke’s team and the team they where playing against switched places on the field. It was now Clarke’s teams turn to play as offence? That was the right term, right? Lexa thought. Honestly Lexa had no idea. 

….

After waiting in line, it was finally Clarke’s turn to hit the ball into the field, and Clarke needed to hit the ball hard and good, making it possible for Octavia and another one of her teammates called Luna to score runs. Clarke walked up to the batting area, picked up the softball bat that was lying on the ground and stood in the position Mr Kane had told them was a good batting position.   
\- Strike – 

Clarke missed the first ball that came flying towards her. 

\- Come on you can do this Clarke

Was that Lexa? Clarke looked up at the grandstand trying to see if she could spot Lexa somewhere in the audience. Clarke’s eyes scanned the audience for a couple of seconds before Clarke could see Lexa smiling and waving at her. 

\- Strike – 

Clarke missed another ball when her thoughts had been wondering off and not concentrating on the game. 

This was it her last chance…she needed to do this she needed to hit the ball. 

The ball came flying towards her…A swing with the bat…She hit it, she actually hit it…Fuck, now she needed to run. 

AN: It is almost midnight, but hey I managed to post a chapter during the weekend, even thought my computer acted strange for a couple of minutes and I was worried that I lost the word document containing everything I have been writing so far. By the way I don't know anything about softball but I tried reading about it on wikipedia so hopefully I am not that far off, and if I am maybe someone could hit me up on twitter (lgbtthemyscira) or tumblr (luthorthemyscira) and teach me about softball. Anyways enjoy this chapter and I see ya next weekend


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Clarke could hear the final sound of the whistle…they did it, they won…they actually won. Clarke couldn’t really believe it. This meant so much for their softball team, they where going to get accepted into the women’s college series. This win had an even more effect on Clarke and Lexa’s relationship, Clarke and Lexa where getting closer to being able to drop Lexa’s chargers. Sure, it was a small step, but at least it was a step in the right direction. Before Clarke knew it, it was like her feet where moving on their own, when they ran to the grandstand and Lexa who somehow and managed to come to the front of the grandstand. Clarke knew that her parents where close, she also knew that what she was going to do would probably make her homophobic parents faint…but Clarke didn’t care. This needed a celebration and what better celebration then to kiss Lexa and ask her to be your girl. Clarke stood up on her the tip of her toes, before bringing her right arm up…brushing a piece of hair from Lexa’s face to the back of her ear, before finally bringing Lexa into a kiss. It took a couple of seconds for Lexa to respond, but soon they were both kissing not caring about the thousands of eyes who were staring right at them. Clarke broke the kiss before whispering to Lexa, only so she could hear. The words be my girl…

…

Lexa had a hard time register what just had happened, was this real life? Did the girl she has feelings for ask her to be her girl? Had she really heard those words, right? Lexa looked at Clarke for an answer. Clarke nodded and smiled, reassuring Lexa that she’d heard the right words. Lexa stared at Clarke with admiration in her eyes before bringing Clarke in for another kiss who lasted for a couple off seconds before breaking their kiss, nodding yes answering Clarke who hadn’t really got a yes or no from her. 

\- Clarke Jane Griffin

Both girls happy moment was interrupted by Clarke parents who stared at them both with disappointing looks on their faces. 

\- You, you did this to our daughter. 

Mrs Griffin walked threateningly towards Lexa later jabbing her finger into Lexa’s chest. 

\- I knew I should have never let you in in our house, Clarke honey you are coming with us. 

Abby did an attempt to grab Clarke’s wrist but before she could get a grip on Clarke’s wrist, Clarke yanked her arms and hand away from her mother. 

\- No mom you can’t force me anywhere. I am over 18 meaning you have no power over me anymore. 

Clarke stared angrily at her mother.

\- Clarke if you leave with her you have no home to come home too. 

Said Clarke’s mother threateningly. 

\- I don’t care. 

Clarke looked to her father Jake who had just stood next to his wife quietly. 

\- What about you dad? Are you hating me now to? Or am I still your little daughter?

Before Jake could answer Abby yanked him away from Clarke…leaving Clarke without an answer….

AN: sorry for the late update, I got really bad writers block and had no idea what to write our how to continue this chapter. heads up next chapter will change the story and how one of our characters are written in the story. Some off you might not like the change, but I have thought about the change for a really long time now and I really want to do it. Do not worry I promise you all that nothing bad will happen to either Clarke our Lexa.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Lexa looked down at the text message they just had written… “ we need to talk” sighed and deleted it again. The text message “we need to talk” felt like a text message you sent to someone before a breakup and Lexa had no plan on breaking it off with Clarke.   
Lexa had no idea how to explain this to Clarke even thought they had been dating for two months by now. How where they going to be able to tell Clarke that they didn’t really feel as a girl, that they thought that their might identifiy as non-binary, how they had no idea who they really were. It felt like they were back in the closet again…confused scared, but this time not with their sexuality, this time with their gender. Lexa’s thoughts went back to what they were going to type…  
“I have something to tell…”  
Lexa deleted the text message once again; did it really have to be that hard. They knew Clarke wouldn’t laugh at her, they knew Clarke would accept them for who they where still typing a message to Clarke was so hard. Maybe just maybe they once and for all should call Clarke instead of sticking to writing text message to her or stupid conversations with the help of gif images.   
Lexa took a deep breathe to calm their nerves before they unlocked their phone, scrolled down to Clarke number (who was saved under their phone contacts as a heart).

One signal…

Two signal…

\- Hey it’s me Clarke…  
\- Hey um babe it’s me…

Before Lexa could continue talking she got interrupted by Clarke voicemail telling Lexa that she wasn’t home right now, probably out playing softball or doing something else…

Honestly Lexa hated those once of voice mails where you think a person is answering and it is just their voice mail. Lexa made a note to themselves that they where going to ask Clarke to change her voice mail. 

But since Clarke didn’t answer they had to try again after an hour or so…

…

An hour finally passed, 60 seconds of thoughts about what Lexa was going to tell Clarke…

Once again Lexa unlocked her phone, spent a couple seconds to find the contacts app. (not to self, sort through the apps on the phone so you find what you are looking for) and called Clarke once again…

\- Hey it’s me Clarke. 

Lexa once got interrupted by Clarke’s voice mail.   
Frustrated they left a message after the beep that consisted of the words, we need to talk…call me…and change your fucking voice mail. 

…

Clarke stumbled into her apartment with the bags in her hand. She had just left the mall with Raven and Octavia and she stupidly also had left her phone meaning that she had been rather bored when she waited for Raven and Octavia to finish trying on clothes. She quickly unlocked her iPhone…and noticed she had a bunch of unread mail’s, facebook notifications but most important of all two missed phone calls from Lexa and one voice mail. Clarke quickly called the number you were supposed to call to listen to the voice mail inside of her phone.

Clarke?

We need to talk? 

What did it mean, was Lexa breaking up with her now that things finally seamed like it was going their way? 

Now that Clarke and her team where getting closer and closer to winning the women college softball series? 

AN: told you something big was happening with one of the characters. I also had a hard time writing this chapter because I didn't know if I would slowly change from using the words she to they or just change it directly. I choose the latest option just because I felt like that was easier for me...even thought that is probably not how it happens in real life. Honestly I don't know since I do not identify as non-binary.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

Clarke rushed out of her own apartment, jumping over the shopping bags filled with clothes that weren’t unpacked. If this had been a non-important situation, Clarke would have unpacked her bags before leaving her apartment. But this, this situation was important. Maybe not for everyone…but it was at least important for her. The words “we need to talk” still echoed in her mind as she hopped into her red 2015 Volkswagen Jetta. A car she had gotten from her parents on her 17th birthday. The road to Lexa’s house who usually took around 10 minutes, felt like forever. For every stop Clarke had to make it felt like hours where ticking by. Clarke finally arrived at the apartment building where Lexa lived, she quickly typed in the security code for Lexa’s apartment building before she rushed up the eight stairs to Lexa’s floor. Riding the elevator would have probably been faster or at least Clarke wouldn’t have felt that exhausted that she felt right now. But last time she had travelled in the elevator, the elevator had dropped like half a meter. And during the seconds it dropped the thoughts holy-shit I am going to die had stilled flashed across Clarke’s mind. (AN: this happened to me in one of the elevators in my school) Clarke finally reached the door to Lexa’s and Lincoln’s apartment before she knocked on the door. 

…

Lexa paced back and forth inside the living room off her apartment. Why oh why had they left such a stupid voice message. Why had they said the words we need to talk…making it sound more serious when it actually was? 

Lexa’s pacing got interrupted by a knock on the door…

Lexa went to open the door and couldn’t open the door wide open before a body pushed past Lexa’s and into the apartment. 

Clarke? Clarke was here?

Clarke who usually would text Lexa before she headed to their apartment, no matter how many times Lexa had told Clarke that she could come whenever she liked since they were actually together…

The apartment that usually where filled with bad jokes, laughter when they where together where filled with an aura…an aura filled with tension, awkwardness and silence. 

\- So, I got your voice mail. Said Clarke after a while breaking the silence inside the room.   
\- Yeah, I figured. Answered Lexa

The tension, awkwardness and silence filled the room once again. 

\- If you are going to break up with me, please do it fast. Said Clarke breaking the silence in the room once again. 

This made Lexa realise that they actually needed to say something instead of just standing there all silent. 

\- No Clarke…I am not going to break up with you. I know it might have sounded like that on the phone, but I promise you that is not the case. Answered Lexa

\- When what did you need to talk about? Asked Clarke

\- IthinkIamnon-binary. Answered Lexa as fast as she could the words in her mouth falling out like mumbles. 

\- What? Said Clarke who hadn’t really heard what Lexa had been saying.

Lexa took a few more deep breaths before opening her mouth once again…this time not saying the words so fast. 

\- I think I am non-binary.

They said it…they had actually said it…and no matter how Clarke reacted they couldn’t be prouder of themselves.

AN: you are not getting Clarke's reaction until next chapter...I feel kinda evil...


	27. Authors Note

Sorry for the lack of updating I have been seriously busy now with school...updates will start again on March 24th-25th


	28. authors note

I am not going to update this story anymore...I am sorry but I have tried writing and coming up with new ideas but I am stuck and I don't know how to continue this story anymore. To everyone who liked this story I am sorry... I am going to continue writing stories tho but they will be shorter since I think it is easier to write shorter stories such as mini fics or one shots


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